Warning: This post discusses death and descriptions of the moments afterward, as told through past-life hypnosis, mediumship transcriptions and other sources. If you feel this post will bring up painful memories or fears, please consider carefully before clicking through.
“It was my soul contract. My time had come, and if I hadn’t been fatally injured when I wrecked the Jeep, I would have left some other way at that same time of my life.”
-Matthew Ward, Matthew Tell Me About Heaven: A Firsthand Description of the Afterlife, 2001
This is Part VIII of a series of posts exploring death experiences and transition stories. Accounts are selected from over a century of mediumship transcriptions, channeling, and life-between-life regression experiences. Selected excerpts focus on the moments leading up to physical death, transition and entry into the spirit world. To read the introduction to this series of posts, please use the link above to open Part I.
In places where you see this symbol, […], I have skipped sentences and/or paragraphs from the original text for the sake of brevity.
Note: While I have found no indication that any of these original sources are fraudulent, I would always encourage the reader to determine the legitimacy of each of these sources for themselves.
Transition Experiences, Part VII
Matthew Ward, 1962 – 1980
Excerpt from Matthew, Tell Me About Heaven: A First-Hand Description of the Afterlife, Ward, Suzanne (Locs. 185-294). Copyright 2001, Matthew Books
In Part VII, Matthew Ward appears as a luminous figure who meets Galen Stoller on an empty beach ten days after Galen has arrived in the spirit world. The Matthew who offers to help Galen send a message to his grieving father is an advanced, mature being of the higher dimensions. And yet, Matthew’s entry into the spirit world was fraught with sadness and difficulty. Matthew’s evolution in the 27 years before he meets Galen on that beach illustrates that the afterlife is a place of learning, growth and self-discovery, but not always free from difficult lessons.
It’s springtime, 1980. Matthew Ward is a handsome, blond 17 year-old who has just finished a day’s work on his father’s spice farm in Panama. Although the day is sunny and dry, Matthew’s Jeep suddenly veers off the road, crashing into a rocky field. Matthew did not survive his injuries, leaving his two brothers, a sister and his parents bereft with grief. For Matthew’s mother, Suzanne, the pain is excruciating. She often prays to be with Matthew – wherever he is.
Several mediums Suzanne contacted were able to communicate with Matthew, but also told her that “when the time was right”, she and Matthew would be able to communicate directly and without the need for an intermediary. Suzanne was puzzled. She did not consider herself a psychic person, nor did she have any mediumship abilities she was aware of. On an ordinary night 14 long years after Matthew’s death, the medium’s prophecy was proven correct: Suzanne was awakened by a message from Matthew described as a ‘lighted ticker tape moving through my mind: “Mother, this is Matthew. Yes, it really is Matthew” Matthew was ready to talk, and his words have filled the pages of several books. The first in the series, Matthew, Tell Me About Heaven: A Firsthand Description of the Afterlife, was published in 2001; seven years after her communications with Matthew began.
What are you about to read is the real and sometimes anguished communication between Matthew and his mother. Anyone who has experienced such a terrible loss might find Suzanne’s embittered protestations familiar. As Suzanne struggles to understand why her son died so young, Matthew attempts to explain one of the most challenging and controversial aspects of spiritual philosophy: the idea that such a tragic loss as Matthew’s death at a young age may have been pre-planned in what is known as a soul contract. Understandably, Matthew’s mother cannot grasp the seeming cruelty of such a thing, and I would expect that no one who has felt such loss could ever rationalize it. Despite this so-called ‘agreement’, Matthew reflects that perhaps his death may not have been in the best interest of the family’s spiritual growth. We are fallible creatures after all – whether incarnated, or in the beautiful climes of Nirvana, as Matthew calls it.
Matthew Ward and Suzanne Ward:
Suzanne: Matthew, what caused the crash?
Matthew: It’s what the family finally concluded, that I simply dozed off. At least that’s the reason the Jeep went off the road. I know some of you thought that if only I’d been listening to the radio, it would have kept me awake. No, Mother, that wouldn’t have changed anything. It was my soul contract. My time had come, and if I hadn’t been fatally injured when I wrecked the Jeep, I would have left some other way at that same time of my life.
Suzanne: The doctor said your injuries were so massive that you couldn’t have survived even with immediate medical help. But all of the mediums I went to told me that you felt no pain because your spirit left your body prior to the crash and you witnessed it from above. How could both be true?
Matthew: The mediums told you what I told them, and hearing that did comfort you, didn’t it? That’s what I intended. But it wasn’t totally accurate for me to say there was no pain, because my body did feel the impact. It is true that my soul was released from my body prior to that moment, so there wasn’t trauma to my entire being. If my soul had stayed within my body then, my psyche would have been severely traumatized prior to my arrival here. Avoiding that kind of trauma is one form of divine grace. It permits easier and faster healing and adjustment here, without the need for the prolonged, intricate treatment required to restore a damaged psyche to full functioning ability. So I did arrive in good condition psychically.
Suzanne: Since your intent was to comfort me, why did you wait nine months to contact me, in my first dream about you after you died? The medium I talked with shortly after the crash said you weren’t ready to communicate with me. Her exact words were, “He is in deep rest and reevaluating his decision to exit,” and she said you would give me an unmistakable sign when you were ready. I interpreted my dream as that sign.
Matthew: You were right about the dream being my sign to you, but that medium could just as well have said I was “depressed.” Mother, I encountered difficulty I wasn’t expecting, and my first several months here were totally unproductive, a very emotionally stressful time. I want you to know that adjustment here does NOT have to be that way! Like every other soul who arrives, I was greeted lovingly and offered every possible assistance and solace during those months. But nothing then could relieve my preoccupation with the family’s reaction to my leaving Earth life. I hadn’t counted on regretting or doubting the wisdom of our pre-birth agreement to let me leave at that young age. But when we made that agreement, we hadn’t anticipated the actual intensity and duration of family grief. In this realm we feel what our beloved souls on Earth are feeling. I never wished to return, but your pain kept me closely bound to all of you during those early months. I was just as paralyzed by it as you were until I was able to fully accept my leaving in accordance with our agreement and shake myself loose from the family’s grief.
Suzanne: I don’t know anything about those “family agreements” you’re talking about, and I’m sorry we affected you the way we did. But OF COURSE we felt grief, Matthew! Just how did you expect us to react to losing you?
Matthew: Mother, dear, I’m not criticizing your feelings. I’m only explaining my beginning here. It was never a case of what I expected, it was that everyone’s pain was far greater than any of us expected when we made the agreement.
Suzanne: How could any agreement be so unthinkably cruel that it wouldn’t consider that?
Matthew: […] At the time of our soul level discussions, all of us felt that my early departure would be handled in a healthful way that would contribute to everyone’s lifetime mission. That isn’t what happened, though. The grieving was not healthful. […]
Suzanne: If your bonds with us stay so strong, Matthew, how can you ever have a normal or independent life there?
Matthew: Mother, it’s no different from loving people in Earth lifetimes and still enjoying other aspects of life. When I finally started moving ahead here, it was because I was free of grief, NOT because I stopped loving you all! Our love bonds are as strong as ever! As for my life here – once I let it get underway, it has been WONDERFUL! I have good friends and especially beloved souls. My work is immensely gratifying. I enjoy sports just as I used to and many other leisure activities, and I study, I travel. Now I have this communion with you, just as the mediums told you we would. So, wouldn’t you say that this life is “normal and independent”? I’d say so!
Suzanne: Yes, dear, it does sound like a full life, a good life, and naturally I’m happy about that. But we still miss you, Matthew. Why did your death at such a young age have to be a part of our family’s agreement? I can’t believe I ever agreed to that.
Matthew: You did, mother, and nothing that isn’t necessary for everyone’s experiencing would ever been part of the family’s agreement. For the moment, please let’s just leave it at that.
It is clear that despite her miraculous ability to speak with her son and his assurances that ‘their love bond is stronger than ever!’, Suzanne continues to mourn Matthew’s death, as expected of any parent who loses a child. As their conversations evolve however, its obvious that Matthew has begun to embrace his new life with enthusiasm. The pages are filled with fascinating descriptions of Matthew’s world, including his apartment, where he can change the view outside the windows to match any scenery he desires. Like most spirits, Matthew reports taking on an occupation. Matthew’s initial ‘job’ is as a welcomer; someone who assists those who transition after death. As he tells his mother proudly, he has quickly risen through the ranks to become a medical assister, handling more difficult and traumatic transitions. In the following few paragraphs, Matthew gives us an inside look at the transition experience from his perspective. Notice the similarities in procedure and logistics to some of the other transition stories presented in this series. Here are just two out of many examples:
The welcomers, who also may be called transition greeters, are the first to meet arrivals at our “regular” entry stations. They’re like hospitality people anywhere who assist newcomers, and they’re present in addition to family and friends on hand. Often emotionally well-adjusted arrivals need only greeting and introduction to the realm.[…] These arrivals enter at treatment stations with tranquil, quietly cheerful private rooms and wards, where sweet-smelling natural fragrances lightly fill the air and pastel colors waft like fluttering sheer curtains at an open window. Outdoors in these areas the sky is softly blue, not its usual brilliance, and there are warm, light breezes. Soothing music is almost inaudible, yet gently stirring for the emotions due to its beautiful chords and fragile harp-like sounds. The entire setting is fluid, with a sensation of soft, warm motions, and all elements are gentle in composition, color and tone (Ward, Loc. 3987).
Consider Hugh Benson and Ruth’s role as ‘welcomers’ in part VI; they assist in the relatively straight-forward transition of an 18-year old boy and bring him to a very similar type of room; with an open window, soft breezes and a comfortable bed.
When each person arrives, Nirvana is exactly what that individual imagined Heaven to be during his Earth lifetime. The energy of the convictions within the individual’s psyche creates for him the Heaven of those convictions. Usually this is in great error! The truth of Nirvana comes to each person with adjustment to being here. Maybe I should say that accepting that truth is the adjustment. It is not what the person’s soul realizes, but what the person’s psyche holds. During the period of remembering what this realm truly is – because the knowledge IS there, it simply has been forgotten – the arrival’s erroneous ideas remain intact psychically, but they cannot be permitted to remain very long (Ward, Loc. 4250).
Compare this A.D. Mattson’s experience in Part I. The pearly gates and St. Peter have appeared for his transition, although his friends and family admit that the recreation was for his own benefit and expectation.
There are many more similarities to be found between all of the books featured in this series. Much of the thrill of studying accounts of the afterlife is puzzling out the overall logistics of a place as complex as the spirit world. Human spirits unfortunately do not become all-knowing after death, so none have seen every part of the spirit world, nor every dimension. Spirits such as Matthew, Galen, Benson, Mattson and the others simply describe their own unique experiences, and by looking behind the words to find the overall commonalities, the multidimensional afterlife begins to take shape in our mind as a wondrous, evolving, surprisingly organized place that caters to advancement, learning, recreation and above all – joy.
I’ll leave this post with a final quote from Matthew (Loc. 4972-4973):
Mother, I know you sometimes wonder if it really matters if people there don’t know all the facets of this realm, that it’s enough that it fits some of the Heaven, hell, purgatory ideas of some religions, and the reincarnation and karma of others, and the eternal life of most. Maybe it doesn’t matter if not every detail of life here is known there, but should the essential TRUTH of Nirvana be known? The answer to that can only be “YES!” How else can the people of Earth know the vital need for emotional balance and non judgement of others, or realize their capacity for negative or positive influence on a universal scale? How else can they grow in spiritual awareness and glory for the duration of their life there and prepare knowledgeably, joyously, for their next lifetime here?
Matthew, Tell Me About Heaven: A Firsthand Description of the Afterlife
by Suzanne Ward